exercise 18

If I had to pick my arch nemesis, it’d be my sister’s dog.

As she walked into the confessional, all she could think was, please Jesus, don’t let this priest be as hot as the last one.

When I told my aunt my boyfriend was shorter than me, she simply replied, it all evens out when you’re lying down.

Tomorrow is the day I will tell him.

In our town there are only two options: get out of here as soon as you can or develop a coke habit.

All things considered, that was probably the best barbeque I’ve been to.

Today, I met a lesbian.

We’d been Jewish for about twelve years.

The only thing I ask of my friends is that they not eat pickles around me.

I looked at my baby in the car seat and knew I had to give her away.

She hates me.

It’s Wednesday again.

Every year, he rereads A Streetcar Named Desire.

He knew that none of them understood Catcher in the Rye like he did; they were all big phonies.

Despite her efforts, her pan de polvo would never come out like her grandmother’s.

They used to be close, the sisters, but not anymore.

It has been three years since her best friend stopped talking to her.

She worked very hard to overcome her pigeon-toed feet.

It’s been too long since her mother’s called.

Almost everyday she tells me robots will take over the world.

He hoped nobody would remember his birthday.